Everything is a Projection
“You are understanding your past wounds more clearly thanks to how they have been reflected back at you by others.”
I saw the above Instagram post on Christmas Eve and couldn't believe how accurate it was for my life. I've always loosely followed astrology just because I think it's fun but never had it been so accurate. I wrote the following piece right after I saw the post and decided it needed to be shared because it follows up yesterday's post perfectly.
A couple weeks ago, I told my therapist this exact thing. I’ve been struggling with people’s negative reactions when I do anything… literally anything. There are people who I feel like are just committed to misunderstanding me. They are committed to believing that I (and probably others in their life) am out to get them. And their negative, immature, toxic, passive aggressive reactions just make life harder.
But I can’t blame them because I’ve been there. I’ve been mentally ill and felt like everyone was out to get me when they weren’t. I’ve been insecure and talked poorly about others out of jealously because I felt like shit about myself. I’ve let my emotions get the best of me and treated people like shit for no reason… when they didn’t deserve it.
I told my therapist that I feel like this year was one big active learning lesson from God. Showing me different unhealthy versions of myself from the past couple years through others. Showing me the pain that I previously (in years past) caused for others through my own actions and reactions. Showing me through others all the unhealthy habits, traits, thought patterns, etc that I’m trying so hard to heal from. Was this the year of ghosts of Alivia’s past? 😅😂
At the end of the day, everything is a projection. If you have people in your life who just make life harder… they are struggling themselves. If you’ve truly been conducting yourself with the best of intentions, it’s not you. The turning point is when you can recognize this. Their hurtful actions, their harsh words, their skewed perception of you… has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the lens they view life through.
They say that you'll be presented with the same problem or situation until you learn your lesson. It feels so good to say I’ve learned my lesson and I’m moving up.
(Don’t get me wrong… it’s still going to sting when an unhealed person does or says something shitty to you 😅 But not letting it have power over you and better yet, responding with understanding and grace is the a real game changer)
Thanks for reading... again! I've got one more blog style post for you tomorrow about what's next for me and Liv Free Boutique 🤍
Thank you for sharing your story. As a mother, let me say how incredibly proud and truly in aw of your growth. Its inspiring and beautiful. What you shared shows healing, care and wisdom. Conitnue your path and jouney there are many more chapters you will share.